Greetings from the vortex. I am working as hard as I work these days. Commercials lined up back to back to back. Looks as though my trip to Italy in early feb will postponed- hopefully I can go end of feb… I really want to go and have a visit- but fuck man the work is coming on strong and I say keep it comin- mommy has bills to pay. So I figure make the hay while the sun shines and take a trip when the opportunity presents itself..
Haven’t had much time for a personal life- just work round the clock. The fucking Bronco’s lost (American football for my EU readers). Whatever… seen the boy a few times… I feel pretty whatever on that front as well.
Fuck it- I came to this town to make money- and well, I am. So happy days right.? But Jesus- I have been going from 6am to 11pm… it’s intense. Just when I get done with commercial work- I get an email with scripts to read… fuckin-a. So I work all day long these days. But it’s all good.
Actually I’m not complaining- it’s good times.
One totally awesome moment was last week I was working on a stage in Manhattan Beach and I got to go on the set of the “OC”. Which is pretty much my favorite show of all time… or at least my favorite guilty pleasure… man I was so fucking excited- full on kid in a candy store… It was almost embarrassing how excited I was- but my producer was equally excited- so it made for shared guilt… there are some pics here.
Then also I did a pretty silly commercial with dogs in it… the videos are pretty funny- will post a few soon, but here are a few pics… fucking advertising.
Anyway beyond that it’s all status quo. Work work work. At least I have a light at the end of the tunnel. What that is, I’m not entirely sure this evening… but I do know that it’s there.
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Sunday, January 15, 2006
K SO.
So, it’s not so bad to be here in LA. It’s actually pretty fun. It’s nice that it’s temporary…. But for now I am totally enjoying myself. I bought a car- a super shiny nice silver Honda CR-V. It’s great… its a 2002 but it feels brand new. I mean, the fucker is perfect…. Not a scratch on it… so that makes it fun to be here- because living in LA means lots of time spent in a car- and having a new one makes that fun.
Been working hard and it’s nice to know that there is money coming in… I’ve been spending lots of time with Damaris and Mimi, and that just fucking rocks. I’ve been seeing lots of movies and watching DVD’s and fuck knows I love the picture show. And I had a date the other night that was totally fun and not annoying or horrible (as they so often are) and so that is promising. Then the Bronco’s won yesterday which is the best shit ever, and tonight I am throwing a surprise birthday party for Damaris- which is fun and naughty and… so. You know- everything is good.
Living with the parents is mostly good, few rough patches… but nothing too intense… just the usual crap.
One thing I hate right now is “the question”. I got the question my senior year of collage, I got it when I finished the short film, and now I’m getting it again. I hate that question. You know the one: “So, what’s next for you?”
“Um, like, I don’t know man- just kinda freeloading off my parents for a while, trying to get out of debt, then gonna go to Colorado where I will freeload a while longer, hand with 2 year olds, make mud pies and then like, I don’t know.”
Maybe I had better answers last time. But I hate answering that question these days. There is always this tone of- you went to Europe… so now what. What epiphany did you have? Like they expect that they I am coming home to take over the world… and well, I guess I feel like I am disappointing them… or maybe I’m disappointing myself… or who the fuck knows… but I don’t want to talk about it. I just kinda want to keep it slow for now. I’ll speed up again… but not today.
Everyone always says in theory giving yourself a “sabbatical from life” is a good thing to do- but the looks one gets at dinner parties when trying to explain that you have no plan- or, more pointedly that the plan is the “anti- plan”… it doesn’t always bode well…it’s hard a hard one to spin…
So anyway- got that going on.
Mostly it’s good. And I feel good. Happy, healthy, looking forward to a lot of travel in the next few months- Rome, NY, Florida… Rhode island, Massachusetts… France… got a lot of miles to travel this year, and it all feels good.
So you know… happy. Happy days- anywhere I am. These days are Happy Days.
Been working hard and it’s nice to know that there is money coming in… I’ve been spending lots of time with Damaris and Mimi, and that just fucking rocks. I’ve been seeing lots of movies and watching DVD’s and fuck knows I love the picture show. And I had a date the other night that was totally fun and not annoying or horrible (as they so often are) and so that is promising. Then the Bronco’s won yesterday which is the best shit ever, and tonight I am throwing a surprise birthday party for Damaris- which is fun and naughty and… so. You know- everything is good.
Living with the parents is mostly good, few rough patches… but nothing too intense… just the usual crap.
One thing I hate right now is “the question”. I got the question my senior year of collage, I got it when I finished the short film, and now I’m getting it again. I hate that question. You know the one: “So, what’s next for you?”
“Um, like, I don’t know man- just kinda freeloading off my parents for a while, trying to get out of debt, then gonna go to Colorado where I will freeload a while longer, hand with 2 year olds, make mud pies and then like, I don’t know.”
Maybe I had better answers last time. But I hate answering that question these days. There is always this tone of- you went to Europe… so now what. What epiphany did you have? Like they expect that they I am coming home to take over the world… and well, I guess I feel like I am disappointing them… or maybe I’m disappointing myself… or who the fuck knows… but I don’t want to talk about it. I just kinda want to keep it slow for now. I’ll speed up again… but not today.
Everyone always says in theory giving yourself a “sabbatical from life” is a good thing to do- but the looks one gets at dinner parties when trying to explain that you have no plan- or, more pointedly that the plan is the “anti- plan”… it doesn’t always bode well…it’s hard a hard one to spin…
So anyway- got that going on.
Mostly it’s good. And I feel good. Happy, healthy, looking forward to a lot of travel in the next few months- Rome, NY, Florida… Rhode island, Massachusetts… France… got a lot of miles to travel this year, and it all feels good.
So you know… happy. Happy days- anywhere I am. These days are Happy Days.
Saturday, January 07, 2006
HELLO NEW YEAR. HOW ARE YOU? NOT SURE YET HUH? ME TOO.
I started my new year decidedly different than any other year ever ever ever. And by that I mean this: I slept right thru the fucker. Seriously. In bed. Asleep. Happy days. That may not seem that unusual to you, but I ‘m a big new years eve-er… I fucking love the night. An excuse to party for no good reason- it’s not religious, it’s not celebrating independence or a person… it’s not about jack shit… it’s about a fucking calendar for god sakes… not THAT is my kind of holiday… instead of new years eve I feel that we should call it “for no good fucking reason”… yes.
But I digress. In just about every year past I have had some extravagant plans whereby a group of friends and I howl at the mood in some mind altered bender at midnight, and no calls me crazy when I set things on fire.
And I had that all lined up this year, I had an excellent small but good times party not far away from the house where I could get shit faced, howl, ice skate, be by a fire, be under the stars, fireworks on hand… perfect… happy days.
But at about 9pm I got in bed, called Shoni told her to count me out, put my eye mask and my ear plugs in and got under the covers.
Somewhere around midnight I woke up to the sound of fireworks, and right out my window was a huge fucking display… I mean huge, and right in basalt. SO without as much as getting out of bed, Pete and I never moved, we just pulled back the curtain, watched the AMAZING show, rolled over and went back to bed. It was kind of awesome.
However, when you are expected to be the “life” of the aforementioned party, the guilt and the expectations and the disappointments when you don’t arrive at said party… well, that shit follows you around… and everyone thinks something is wrong with you and blah blah blah.
And I’m like “no man, I was just tired…”
But I can see a trend starting here. Not about new years, but with my friends looking for the chase they used to know and not having an easy time finding her.
----
Back in LA I feel like I am finally back in the states now. The last month has been such a cluster fuck- between work, incognito, driving to Colorado and the f-ing holidays… mama needs a break.
So I have spent the past few days paying bills, organizing my life, moving in to a comfortable level, seeing movies.. but mostly my time has been spent shopping for a car.
The last two times I have bought a car it was always fun… I mean shopping for a car means … well- YOU GET A NEW CAR. But this time it sucks ass. I attribute this to two factors. Firstly I am buying a used car (blarg). And secondly I don’t really WANT a car. I’d rather not thank you very much. And if I HAVE to… I thinking hybrid. Did you know those mother fuckers START at $30,000? Fuck that. Do you have $30,000? Cuz I sure as shit don’t. So then I’m like- go boring, reliable.. think rental car but not rented right? Oh for fuck sake how blasted boring is that?!!
I want character, spunk, spice, life… verve… But I also want the fucker to start in the morning. Ahhh the precarious nature of consumerism.
So after 4 days of 5 hours a day searching, I think I found a car that will due. I am driving down to Long Beach in the morning to check it out.
I think I am going to buy an SUV. Pause, wait for the “I’m joking” Actually I’m not. It’s not really a SUV, except that technically it is. It ‘s the Honda CR-V. It’s like a girly SUV. Lacks the gas guzzling cahones of a “real” SUV. No this puppy will get 30 miles to the gallon, a SUV I think not. (it’s essentially a civic on a truck chassis…
So anyway. I want to kill myself because those car salesmen are blood sucking greed mongering devil dick heads…. But I trudge on- thru the fiery pits of consumerism… trying to find my cay, one car panel at a time…
God damn this country is bleak. I guess the upside of buying a car is that the soon I get it the sooner I can see LA in my rear view window as I get the fuck out of this town. Ha.
But I digress. In just about every year past I have had some extravagant plans whereby a group of friends and I howl at the mood in some mind altered bender at midnight, and no calls me crazy when I set things on fire.
And I had that all lined up this year, I had an excellent small but good times party not far away from the house where I could get shit faced, howl, ice skate, be by a fire, be under the stars, fireworks on hand… perfect… happy days.
But at about 9pm I got in bed, called Shoni told her to count me out, put my eye mask and my ear plugs in and got under the covers.
Somewhere around midnight I woke up to the sound of fireworks, and right out my window was a huge fucking display… I mean huge, and right in basalt. SO without as much as getting out of bed, Pete and I never moved, we just pulled back the curtain, watched the AMAZING show, rolled over and went back to bed. It was kind of awesome.
However, when you are expected to be the “life” of the aforementioned party, the guilt and the expectations and the disappointments when you don’t arrive at said party… well, that shit follows you around… and everyone thinks something is wrong with you and blah blah blah.
And I’m like “no man, I was just tired…”
But I can see a trend starting here. Not about new years, but with my friends looking for the chase they used to know and not having an easy time finding her.
----
Back in LA I feel like I am finally back in the states now. The last month has been such a cluster fuck- between work, incognito, driving to Colorado and the f-ing holidays… mama needs a break.
So I have spent the past few days paying bills, organizing my life, moving in to a comfortable level, seeing movies.. but mostly my time has been spent shopping for a car.
The last two times I have bought a car it was always fun… I mean shopping for a car means … well- YOU GET A NEW CAR. But this time it sucks ass. I attribute this to two factors. Firstly I am buying a used car (blarg). And secondly I don’t really WANT a car. I’d rather not thank you very much. And if I HAVE to… I thinking hybrid. Did you know those mother fuckers START at $30,000? Fuck that. Do you have $30,000? Cuz I sure as shit don’t. So then I’m like- go boring, reliable.. think rental car but not rented right? Oh for fuck sake how blasted boring is that?!!
I want character, spunk, spice, life… verve… But I also want the fucker to start in the morning. Ahhh the precarious nature of consumerism.
So after 4 days of 5 hours a day searching, I think I found a car that will due. I am driving down to Long Beach in the morning to check it out.
I think I am going to buy an SUV. Pause, wait for the “I’m joking” Actually I’m not. It’s not really a SUV, except that technically it is. It ‘s the Honda CR-V. It’s like a girly SUV. Lacks the gas guzzling cahones of a “real” SUV. No this puppy will get 30 miles to the gallon, a SUV I think not. (it’s essentially a civic on a truck chassis…
So anyway. I want to kill myself because those car salesmen are blood sucking greed mongering devil dick heads…. But I trudge on- thru the fiery pits of consumerism… trying to find my cay, one car panel at a time…
God damn this country is bleak. I guess the upside of buying a car is that the soon I get it the sooner I can see LA in my rear view window as I get the fuck out of this town. Ha.
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